Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Meet the New Boss, Same as the Old Boss

Hail, Caesar! Er, Harold!

So Harold Ford, failed Senate candidate in Tennessee - and one of the few Blues to lose in November's Night of the Long Dem Tongs - is replacing Blue Dog Tom Vilsack as Chair of the DLC.

Sacre blue! What a coup!

He's handsome, he's black, he's highly telegenic. He comes from an old Tennessee political family (which his opponent, Repub Bob Corker characterized as a "political machine" during the campaign) with ties all over the South, never mind the state, and he talks good. No Obama, maybe, but not bad. A catch, definitely.

But wait!

There's something...odd. Ford is a Democrat, yes. (I know. I checked.) But his ideas are all Republican.
He...frequently invokes God on the trail and even filmed an ad in a church.

"I grew up in that church. I was baptized in that church. And the kind of attacks that we're taking in this campaign have been so fierce and so unrelenting, that I've relied on my faith a whole lot in this campaign," Ford said, insisting he had not crossed the line with the ad. "So it seemed pretty natural to me."
Oh, goody, a right-wing DLC Chair who's against (so far, remember) about half of the Democratic Party's key issues - you know, the ones that tell the public they're not Republicans? What a surprise. The DLC has never had a Republican Stealth Chair before (except for all the others, of course). This will be different.


Good thing he changed his mind on the war because that's what will separate him from the Re--

Oh, wait. They're bailing out now, too, aren't they? Well, goddammit, there must be something Ford believes that he didn't get from Newt Gingrich or the Bible. Hmmm.

Taxes? No. He's in favor of killing the estate tax that affects really, really, rich people and he wants to extend Bush's 2001 tax cut package.

Energy? No. He echoes Baby Bush in the SOTU.

Aha! Here's one: he's against pork barrel spending.

Every dollar spent on pork is a dollar that could be better invested or returned to the taxpayers. Astonishingly, the money spent on pork exceeds the entire budget for homeland security ($41 billion), despite the huge gaps in border security, port security, and disaster preparedness.
Oh, wait. He's only against it when he's not the one getting it. (How very Republican of him!)
He has helped direct hundreds of millions of homeland security funding to Tennessee. Ford has even asked for more funds over and beyond what President Bush requested.
Aaaaaahhh, here we go. He's for raising the minimum wage!
"People who work hard everyday trying to create a better life for their families deserve better, especially when the heads of oil companies are enjoying record profits and astronomical pensions. It is an issue of fairness to raise the minimum wage for hard working Tennesseans and Americans."
Yay! A true Democrat! (Of course, that quote comes from the campaign. I wonder if he still feels that way?)

Never mind. Al From likes him, and that's what counts. And Al From is a Democrat. Isn't he?